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    Not Ready To Date Online?

    July 4th, 2017 by bujes.marketing

    You’ve been considering joining a dating frinendfinder site, haven’t you? You’ve been thinking it’s a little too risky—something that you wouldn’t normally do. Dating online might seem like something for the daring, but it’s really one of the best ways that people can meet other singles. The process is really simple. It just takes that little nudge over the edge. Once you get into it and understand the easy elements that make up most dating sites, you’re bound to come to the same conclusions about online dating as millions of other people. Take, for example, me!

    Years ago, I had just come out of a serious relationship and needed to get back on the horse. A friend of mine suggested a website that had a lot of local people on it. It wasn’t one of the more well-known ones and, since I wasn’t sure I wanted a lot of people to see me online anyway, it seemed like a perfect fit. I thought people I knew would think less of me if they saw me on a singles site—that I might appear desperate in some way. It wasn’t an easy decision to make. It required I step outside of my comfort zone. I had to put my fears of what other people thought out of my mind. After a little bit of coxing, I decided to do up a profile and see what it was all about.

    “I wasn’t willing to pass up what has easily become the best way for single adults to meet…”

    The first few steps were daunting. I had to come up with a screen name, a tag line for my profile and fill out a questionnaire. I wasn’t prepared for everything I was being asked. I remember after the first barrage of questions came to an end thinking that it was over and I could get on to exploring the site. Wrong! More questions appeared, including one asking me for what they called “witty words.” What the heck were they talking about? The sweat started to build on my brow. I felt a large lump lodge in my throat. My forehead creased from the strain caused by the magnitude of the question. The pressure was on and I couldn’t be “witty” on the spot like that! I closed my browser and walked off scarred from my first experience on an online dating site.

    Wait, hold on a second. First off, I can string a few sentences together when I need to. Second, I don’t quit! Back to the computer I went. I opened up my browser and a word processing program. This wasn’t going to get the better of me! Plus, I knew my friends were meeting great people online, so I wasn’t going to let them have all the fun. I managed to bang out a profile and uploaded some pictures. Sure enough, it wasn’t long before emails and winks found their way into my inbox. That’s how it has been since I first signed on and how it continues to this day.

    Stories usually have a moral, as does this one. Most of us are scared of things we’re not used to. It’s the fear of the unknown and humanity has suffered from it since time began. Online dating isn’t any different. My fear that I would look silly or desperate came from the unknown. However, once I came to the conclusion that anyone who saw me online was there for the same reason I was—they were single and looking, too—it brought everything around full circle for me. I have never had someone come up to me and say they saw me online, despite the fact that I’ve been on some of the most popular dating sites on the planet. I have, however, had some old friends send me messages to reconnect and that’s never been a bad thing. I learned quite quickly how much value there is from dating online. I wasn’t willing to pass up what has easily become the best way for single adults to meet, and neither should you!

    Posted in Miscellaneous | No Comments »

    Second Date Blues

    July 4th, 2017 by bujes.marketing

    I had just finished another one of those less-than-inspiring dates. We had coffee at a restaurant but I knew from the time I sat down that it didn’t have any potential. After, I walked her through the crowded, big block store parking lot, jammed with minivans bringing their kids to Toys-R-Us and SUV’s parked with their rear ends out for easy loading, waiting for their owners to return with bags full of accents for the home. I gave her a hug and told her I’d see her online friendrfinder —truthful in that I would see her but stopping short of broaching the subject of future dates. We parted ways when a thin Indian boy of 16 or 17 years approached me.

    “Excuse me,” he said as I walked by him. He then quickly turned and began to keep pace with me. “I’m sorry, but was that a first date you were on?”

    “Why do you want to know?” I responded, slightly slowing my pace but not wanting to seem too forthcoming as this situation was getting weirder by the second.

    “I saw you talking to that girl. I have this problem. I keep going on dates but they never seem to turn into anything after.”

    Ah, okay: young guy, lost for love and in need of direction. He wasn’t a young punk hell-bent on robbing me blind. For him, a brother in need of sage advice from someone who’s gone before, I have time!

    It’s a common problem and I’m not sure there’s an easy solution to second date blues. I always say it comes down to the type of person you are, which means you can fall into three categories. The first type doesn’t need or want to date anyone. The second type thinks they have an idea of who they’re after and won’t settle for dating anyone who doesn’t fit the mold. Finally, the third group really finds it easy to date many types of people and isn’t as concerned about the criteria for company. From my experience, I think that the third category is by far the most populated.

    I look to the time I went and tried speed dating. I had gone on the request of the owner who on occasion was short for guys and needed to fill a seat. By speed dating, we’re talking 25 dates in two hours at a local restaurant. For those that have never been, it’s certainly a night of work, but definitely an experience!

    We were given these long, rectangular yellow cards with 25 lines on them. As you went from table to table, you were to mark down details about the date, which ones you liked and didn’t like, or even include drawings if it was four minutes of pure boredom. At the end, you submitted the cards to the hosts and if there was a match, meaning you wrote that you were interested in Single Girl 16 and Single Girl 16 penciled in that she liked you, you would both be sent each others email to take things to the next level. Stop right now and think for a second: if this was you, in a room full of 25 single members of the opposite sex, all in your age bracket, how many would you expect to be interested in seeing again? Your answer is a clear indication of which of the three categories you would belong to.

    Standing with a group of guys after, one of them looked at my card and asked me how the I planned on remembering which girls I was interested in if I hadn’t made a single mark on my page. Now you might think I fall into the first category, the kind of person who really doesn’t need anyone, but remember this was a singles event and I wasn’t there to kill time. I knew that there may be one or two people in there that I might click with, and if I couldn’t remember which ones they were, I shouldn’t be left unsupervised or be allowed to operate a motorized vehicle. I fall into category two.

    That night I was the only category two guy out of the eight that stood chatting. All the rest, it seemed, fell into category three—the same catagory as my young Indian friend. I’m not suggesting one category is better than any of the others. Category three people meeting and falling in love is the same as any category two couple hooking up. Perhaps threes can even find it faster seeing as they’re dating more. But second date blues are certainly a symptom that comes from the feeling that most people you go out with are a possible match, and that’s not a good thing.

    I answered the boy as best I could. I told him that I, too, was once like him. I said over the years I learned, for me at least, there were few people I was really compatible with and that these days, my spare time was too important to be spending with people that I knew weren’t a good match. It’s either he date up a storm and learn the hard way or sit down and really think about what qualities he wants in a girlfriend.

    Those are really the only two ways to cure the second date blues and even then it’s a long shot. Getting to know who you are and what makes you happy is a lifelong process. It certainly wouldn’t be much fun if there were easy answers. So enjoy the dates you have and worry less about how they turn out. Try and work on becoming more self-aware. That’s really the best way to cure those Second Date Blues!

    Posted in Food and Drink | No Comments »

    First Date Tips: How to Get a Girl to Like YOU

    July 4th, 2017 by bujes.marketing

    A first date is a nerve-wracking experience.

    That is why so many guys desire quality first date tips. It is often not that a guy can’t figure out the ‘right’ thing to do, but sometimes under heat and pressure of the moment making those ‘right’ moves seem difficult.

    “But wait,” you say. Not all women are the same so there will not always be a “right” thing to do. You are correct and you are very wrong. Not all women desire the same things in guys, that is true, but there are some things that almost all women want that is true enough to seem universal.

    To start, its important that you know how to create sexual tension. This is a feeling a girl has on the first date where she feels like thinks simply click with a guy. The good news is there are a few ways you can create this emotional state on date.

    With that said, here a number of tips that can help get a girl to like you on the first date:

    First date grooming standards.

    It is true not all women like their men to look the same. Some might like an elegant friendrfinder look and some might like a little bit of the unshaven, “bad boy” look. Regardless all women want the men who approach them to be groomed and clean. It is the specifics that only vary. Anyone who smells like a week old sock and looks like they wash their clothes at Grease-Stains-R-Us is going to find themselves very lonely, very quickly.

    Well, I am sure anyone reading this does not need to be lectured on grooming standards. None of you need to be hosed down before going into public, do you?

    Anyhow, enough of that distraction, let’s get back to the dating tips. My point is that many people think that there are not any real first date tips, but there certainly are.

    Perhaps you think the secret to a first date is bringing the woman to a fancy restaurant were showering her with gifts? Again, if you think that youre also wrong. If successful first date has nothing to do with the fancy expensive restaurant or kissing a girls butt! The perfect first date doesnt take any of those actions. In fact they can decrease your chance of success on the first date. Not to mention wasting your time and energy.

    This is in depth article on first date tips. It is not some cheap 300 word regurgitated content article. This article goes in depth in teaching you what you need to know is actually more like a mini report that a simple first date tips article. In this article I shall be covering:

    How to get a girls number to set up the first date

    Easy first date ideas and where to take her for the first date

    Some guidelines for successful first date conversation

    General tips for first date

    First date conversation dos and donts

    How to transition from first date to the second date or even possibly to the bedroom

    As you can see theres a lot to cover, so let’s get going…

    Setting up the first date is an essential part of the process. Until you have that date all of this information is simply a moot point. So the first thing you need to do is one the best way to get a date with that girl you just met.

    The best way to do this is to be like a salesman. Salesman often do something called, “assuming the sale.”

    A good salesman has many little tricks to get keep up the buy. Assuming the sale is one of the most powerful of these techniques. When used properly assuming the sale can really be a secret weapon to increasing your chances of setting up dates with hot women. Heres how it works…

    Obviously you are trying to sell her anything. Or are you? In fact you are. You are trying to sell yourself. She has no idea who you are. You could be a lemon or BMW. How is she to know? Assuming the sale is all about using words to assume she already accepts.

    Im sure youve seen salesmen do this… “So would you like the extended warrantee or the Limited warranty” is a common sales technique even before somebody has actually agreed to purchase the item. It assumes I guess because the product is “so good” that anybody would be foolish not to accept.

    When you assume the “date” with a girl you do the same thing. After talking to a girl for a bit and hopefully gaining some sort of attraction from her you ask her out on a date. But you dont do it in a hesitating manner. Do it in a way that assumes she will say yes. Not only does the schema psychological advantage but also shows you are extremely confident. Something that women love. To get her to accept your first date proposal try assuming the date like this:

    “Ive loved talking to you this evening. You are a lot of fun. Let’s go out this next weekend, what day is better for you Friday or Saturday?”

    After you asked this question is important just to look at her and await a response. She may not say anything for a while awaiting sign of weakness. If you look away, look embarrassed or talk first after this you have failed. She must be the one to reply. If she says shes not interested in a date with you chances are youve read your signals wrong and she is really simply not interested in you. If she is interested although posing the question this manner will bring about you most likely chance for success.

    Once you said yes to the date try to get her phone number but also “assuming the date”. Try to get her number by assuming the date in a fashion like this:

    “Great, we will go out ________. I will call you in a couple days to confirm the plans. Which number to want to give me your cell or your home number?”

    This is a tactic that is sure to get you a lot more first dates than any other hesitant and scared approach. It takes a fair amount of confidence or at least pretending to have confidence to do it. But when done properly assuming the date(sale) is simply one of the best first date tips you can imagine.

    Simply put, to get a girls attention she needs to feel attraction.

    A successful first date with a girl is not about spending a lot of money. If all she wants from you are expensive gifts and fancy meals then let me clue you in on something… She does not like you, she likes your money.

    Honestly though, most women are not like that. The guys looks and/or finances matter but only in the most minor way. Women are far more interested with the guy that is confident, self-assured and fun.

    So rather than blowing, money and still creating an uncomfortable situation for your first date want to focus on things that matter, like making sure your date is both enjoyable and low key. That is the key to a great first date. You want the date to be memorable, fun and establish some sort of connection between you and the girl.

    Posted in Entertainment | No Comments »